So many sleepless nights have found me wandering comfortless streets in search of peace, any release from who i'm have become.

I had a mixed emotion day yesterday. I found out my old manager stella was coming in town. Which that meant a trip to Independent Bar. And i hate going downtown. I don't drink nor do i dance, so i find going to clubs and bars useless. But it was for stella, so i went. I haven't seen her in months. She hasn't changed a bit. But yesterday was going well till i found out i couldn't really get out of going to the bar. Then i started thinking about things that i try so hard to forget. And when i think about it, it consumes me. I think it all comes from me being so freakin' insecure, and i hate it so much. But i mainly hate myself. I have that feeling of being a failure at life. It often comes and goes. It was gone for a while, but rest assured it has returned. It is like life is a video game that i just can't conquer.

But i was created to conquer. Failure.